Oprah Winfrey hasn’t married because she doesn’t want the “day-in-day out commitment” needed to make a marriage work.
The ‘Oprah Winfrey Show’ star has been in a relationship with Stedman Graham since 1986, and has said that despite pressure to marry him, the pair never tied the knot because she didn’t want to make any “sacrifices” or “compromises” when it came to her career.
Writing in her ‘What I Know For Sure’ column in February’s issue of O Magazine, she said: “For years, there were hundreds of tabloid stories, weekly, on whether we would marry. In 1993, the moment after I said yes to his proposal, I had doubts. I realised I didn’t actually want a marriage. I wanted to be asked. I wanted to know he felt I was worthy of being his missus, but I didn’t want the sacrifices, the compromises, the day-in-day-out commitment required to make a marriage work. My life with the show was my priority, and we both knew it.”
Oprah, 65, and Stedman now both believe their romance would have ended long ago if they’d decided to get married, and they both enjoy their life together the way it is.
She added: “He and I agree that had we tied the marital knot, we would not still be together. Our relationship works because he created an identity beyond being ‘Oprah’s man’ (he teaches Identity Leadership around the world and has written multiple books on the subject). And because we share all the values that matter (integrity being No. 1). And because we relish seeing the other fulfil and manifest their destiny and purpose.”
The media mogul took a moment to gush over her man, whom she dubbed as a “genuine gentleman”, and said their bond is exactly what a “spiritual partnership” should be.
Oprah wrote: “Anyone who's ever met him is always amazed by what a genuine gentleman he is. He's so positive. Wants the best for me and everyone he knows. Truly wishes people well. Doesn't curse. (I've been known to.) Never have I heard him gossip or say a negative thing about anyone. (I have, plenty of times.)
“He's appropriately named because he's steady as a mountain. Even-tempered, accountable, trustworthy, patient.
“[Our romance is] what Gary Zukav defines as a spiritual partnership: partnership between equals for the purpose of spiritual growth."