Prince Harry has revealed that he "didn't want" his royal role following the death of his mother, Princess Diana.
The Duke of Sussex has spoken candidly about his complicated relationship with royal life after Diana's death in 1997.
Addressing a private charity event in Melbourne, Australia, on Thursday, Harry recalled feeling "completely powerless" under mounting pressure.
"Times when I've felt lost, betrayed or completely powerless. Times when the pressure - externally and internally - felt constant," he stated, via PA Media. "And times when, despite everything going on, I still had to show up pretending everything was OK, so as not to let anyone down."
The 41-year-old also opened up about grieving his mother in the public eye when he was a young teenager.
"In my experience, loss is disorienting at any age," he said. "Grief does not disappear because we ignore it. Experiencing that as a kid while in a goldfish bowl under constant surveillance, yes, that will have its challenges. And without purpose, it can break you."
Following his speech, Harry took part in a discussion with businessman and former politician Brendan Nelson. During the conversation, he explained that he was reluctant to take on royal duties after his mother's death, weeks before his 13th birthday.
"I was like, 'I don't want this job. I don't want this role - wherever this is headed, I don't like it,'" he admitted. "It killed my mum and I was very much against it, and I stuck my head in the sand for years and years."
However, Harry said he later came to believe that Diana would have wanted him to embrace his position.
"Eventually I realised, 'Well, hang on, if there was somebody else in this position, how would they be making the most of this platform and this ability and the resources that come with it to make a difference in the world?'" he shared. "And that really changed my own perspective."
Diana died in August 1997, aged 36, after sustaining multiple serious injuries in a car crash in Paris while being pursued by paparazzi.
Harry and his wife, Meghan, Duchess of Sussex, stepped down as senior working royals in 2020. The couple live in California with their two children, Prince Archie, six, and Princess Lilibet, four.
