05 November 2020
Newsdesk
Michael J. Fox suffered the "darkest moment" of his life in 2018 after breaking his arm as he learned to walk again following secret spinal surgery.
The Back to the Future star, who went public with his battle with Parkinson's Disease in 1998, revealed he began experiencing intense pain two years ago. He then underwent successful surgery to remove a noncancerous a tumour doctors found in his spine, and spent the next four months in rehab to get back on his feet. However, while staying in his New York home, preparing for a cameo in a movie Spike Lee was producing, 2019 sci-fi film See You Yesterday, Fox's recovery took a turn for the worst.
On the day of the shoot, the 59-year-old fell and broke his arm - an accident which led to his "darkest moment".
"I just snapped," he said.
"I was leaning against the wall in my kitchen, waiting for the ambulance to come, and I felt like, 'This is as low as it gets for me'. It was when I questioned everything," Fox recalled.
"Like, 'I can't put a shiny face on this. There's no bright side to this, no upside. This is just all regret and pain. Parkinson's, my back, my arm... it still didn't add up to moving the needle on the misery index compared to what some people go through."
The experience caused Fox to question his usual optimism.
"I thought, 'How can I tell these people, 'Chin up. Look at the bright side. Things are going to be great?'" he mulled.
However, in a bid to regain his formerly positive outlook, Fox started watching TV reruns as he recovered in bed - particularly game shows from the 1970s.
Reflecting on how things turned around for him, the star mused: "Optimism is sustainable when you keep coming back to gratitude, and what follows from that is acceptance. Accepting that this thing has happened, and you accept it for what it is."
He added: "It's not that I wasn't sincere before, but my gratitude is deeper now, from having gotten through the darkest times."
